January 1969

Evening Post 3rd January 1969

At the Shell petrol station on the corner of Charing Road and Goudhurst Road, in Twydall, I claimed a free ticket for a promotional evening at Chatham’s Central Hall, for a special screening of Manchester United’s European Cup win the previous year. Local celebrities, including Gillingham’s Carl Gilbert and Kent cricketer Alan Knott got the evening off to a good start when they appeared on stage to kick plastic footballs into the audience. Gilbert, always the entertainer, stole the show with a fresh air kick that drew great laughter from the audience. When the screening got underway I was surprised at the level of support for United. The audience cheered as the goals went in and there was loud applause when the show came to an end with United running round Wembley with the cup.

The language of the playground…

‘Give us a sweet.’

‘I ain’t got any.’

‘Aww c’mon, don’t be Jewish.’

‘Tough cheddar, I’ve got none left.’

‘You lying Arab! Come here, let’s have a look.’

‘Argh! Get off me, you brown!’

I discovered a new way of wasting money when I bought a Top of the Pops LP at Twydall Woolworths and took it home to my groovy pad, as suggested by the blurb on the back of the sleeve. I liked The Good the Bad and the Ugly and I liked Lily the Pink. Son of a Preacher Man was alright and so was Ob-La-di-Ob-la-da. I didn’t mind Something’s Happening, Albatross or Atlantis, but I didn’t buy the LP to hear any of those songs. I bought it so I could listen carefully to Ain’t Got No I got Life, to see if they really did sing ‘I’ve got tits,’ like Martin Waterman said.

I listened to that track over and over, straining my ears, yet I never heard one mention of tits. And I didn’t even like the bloody song. What a waste of money. At least I had some fun when I upped the speed to 78rpm and heard what sounded like Pinky and Perky’s version of those songs.

At the end of January I turned fourteen.

Next day the Beatle’s appeared on the news, performing on top of the Apple building in London. They must have been freezing.